Worm in the Apple

Photo Credit: ABC Family

EscApe from New York


Pretty Little Liars

Season 5, Episode 1 – “EscApe from New York”

Original Airdate: June 10, 2014

Contains spoilers if you have not watched the episode


“Maybe he…she…bitch is.” – Spencer

“This changes everything.” – Mona

“It’s over.” – A

“I guess you don’t read Sun Tzu, bitch.” – Hanna

“They’re coming.” – Mona

“The bigger we are, the harder she falls.” – Mona


The season premiere begins with the girls trying to stop Aria from rushing towards Ezra, who is on a stretcher getting loaded into an ambulance. The girls do not want Aria to have to answer questions from the police.  Noel Kahn, meanwhile, is being questioned by the police.  He says he heard the gunshot and found Ezra on the roof.  Ali watches the scene from the balcony and sees A is on top of the ambulance as it pulls away.  What?  That is either incredibly stupid or brilliant.  I don’t know which right now.  A, in all his/her magical powerfulness, is already at the hospital when they wheel Ezra in.


As always, boy crazy Aria is focused on Ezra while everyone else is concerned for Ali. Remember when Aria used to be a cool, artsy girl.  Yeah, I almost forgot, too.  Anyway, Hanna calls the police and tells them that Ezra needs protection in the hospital.   Spencer starts talking about The Art of War, but Hanna shushes her.  The girls are supposed to split up, but Emily is like Scooby-Doo and Shaggy and doesn’t want to.  Hanna gives Aria the gun for protection.  This is one of their first idiot moves of the season.  Isn’t this the gun that shot Ezra.  Couldn’t A easily frame them for Ezra’s attempted murder?  That gun needs to go in the river if they’re not going to turn it in to the police.  Maybe I watch too much Investigation Discovery and maybe they need to tune in.  They do split up: Hanna, Spencer and Emily leave together and Aria and Ali head straight to the hospital.


At the Hastings’ house everyone is reeling. Veronica doesn’t want to believe that Spencer knew Ali was alive all this time, but of course Spencer didn’t know until Halloween.  Melissa blames Ali for Spencer’s problems and says she doesn’t understand how Ali could pretend to be dead.  Melissa is crying, but says it is for the girl that is really dead.  Melissa tries to tell Veronica what she told her father, Peter, but the police arrive.


Ali says that Ezra was probably following A in order to get Aria back and wants to know if Ezra has a chance. Really, does anyone care right now?  Spider-A is running around New York and these girls can’t stop talking about boy problems.  They got 99 problems and Ezra ain’t one, seriously.


Back at the Hastings house, Holbrook tells the Hastings that CeCe knocked out a police officer and escaped. Is anyone surprised?  I’m not.  CeCe is a crafty snake.


Meanwhile, Mona is watching a news story about the missing liars and sees they include Ali as one of the missing girls. Stuff is about to go down because Mona hates Ali.


Ezra has surgery to remove the bullet while A walks around wearing black under his / her lab coat. Yup, I’ll file that under stupid, not brilliant.  Hanna, Emily and Spencer spot A because it is obvious that this criminal is walking around.  A watches the girl as Ali is paged over the intercom.  A then sends a group text that says “It’s happening.  Follow the leader.”


A follows Ali out of the hospital to a deserted playground. Ali hides, but the masked figure corners her and asks, “Wanna play?”  Spencer, Hanna and Emily show up and the masked figure gets a face full of mace.  This is the first time in a long time that I cheered for something the girls did.  More masked figures show up and surround the girls until the police show up.  Thanks, NYPD.


Mona is on the phone with someone telling them to stay on top of “this.” Mona turns around and tells Lucas (the lying bastard who acted like he bullied by Mona so much that he had to leave school) that the girls are in New York.


Back the very active Hastings home, Melissa tells Peter that she wants to tell Holbrook the truth, which will make Spencer come home. I have no idea what that truth is and how it impacts Spencer.  Mr. Hastings gets this very scary look on his face and says Veronica can never know.  This must be a juicy, little tidbit.


Holbrook gets a call from NYPD about Ezra’s shooting. Two things are interesting: Holbrook doesn’t know who Ezra is and the police have Ezra’s fingerprints in the system.


Back in New York, Aria doesn’t want the others to come to the hospital. Emily thinks the A-team will target Ali now, so they go to hide out in Fitzgerald Theater, as in Ezra Fitzgerald.  Ezra took Ali there before and Ali found out he was a rich boy pretending to be poor.  He is a known liar and I still do not trust him.  There is a real gun on the stage.  File that away for later.


Spencer’s stomach grumbles, so they get a snack from the concession stand. They start to talk about a show they watch and Ali looks left out.  Ali goes upstairs to call some of her friends.   Hanna tries to eavesdrop, but is unsuccessful.


Shana shows up at the hospital saying that Ali sent her. Shana tries to be nice to Aria, but Aria shoots her down (no later pun intended).


Later, Ali is taking a nap of the stage of the theater while Spencer, Emily and Hanna try to have a conversation. Spencer thinks that Ali is shutting them out again.  Emily thinks that this will all be over soon, but Emily has always been naive.  They imagine what life will be without A and Spencer says she doesn’t want to be the person she used to be, she just wants to be happy.  Aw, shucks now.


Later, CeCe sneaks into the theater to ask for Ali’s help. They go to a diner and Noel gives CeCe the passport and cash meant for Ali. CeCe tells Ali they will find their way back to each other and Noel asks if they are going to kiss.  He’s such a boy.


Aria wakes up in the waiting room and goes to see Ezra, who is now in recovery. Shana is already in the room.  Shady alert.  Ezra wakes up and goes into soap opera style cardiac episode when he sees Aria and Shana.  Aria yells for help and Shana disappears.


When Ali makes her way back to the theater, Emily is up waiting for her like a jealous wife. Ali spills the beans about CeCe and tells Emily that Slimeball Ezra was paying CeCe for information and that CeCe was never Red Coat.  In fact, CeCe helped save Emily from the box before she was chopped into pieces. Does that mean Aria went all kung fu on CeCe for no reason? Another bombshell is that CeCe killed Wilden for Ali.  Ali didn’t say why, but whoa.


Mona has gathered an army of people that Ali used to torture. Apparently, it was a lot of people.  The group includes Paige and Lucas.  Paige doesn’t want to participate, but Mona reminds her that Ali broke up Paige and Emily.  Melissa shows up (!) and Paige decides to stay.  I hope Paige is there to spy and not join the overly long list of villains on this show.


Aria tries to call the girls to update them on Ezra, but the girls are having cell issues, so Aria calls the phone at the theater. Aria is disconnected.  When the phone rings again, Ali answers.  It is not Aria on the phone, it is Holbrook.  I’m impressed; a police officer on this show actually figured something out.


Aria goes into the room to see a still alive and overly dramatic Ezra. I guess his heart can handle seeing her.  Ezra whispers something to Aria and Aria runs out of the room.


After letting Spencer and Hanna know that Ali no longer has the passport, the girls decide to leave the theater when all of a sudden, the lights go out. It’s Shana.  Sing it, “Shana’s got a gun.”  I love how much this show makes me reinterpret Aerosmith.  Shana confesses that she is the one that locked them in the lodge and she wants to get justice for Jenna (I imagine for the whole firecracker in the face thing).  Aria sneaks up and hits Shana with the real gun that just so happens to be on the stage.  Shana falls off the stage seemly breaking her neck, like a soap opera, again.  She doesn’t have a pulse and Emily actually checked for one.  Just like that, ding dong the witch is dead.  Spencer calls 911 and says there has been an accident.


The girls get out of there before the police arrive and discover Shana’s body. I don’t know if it was a continuity issue or something A did, but the body looks different.


So far, so good. This season started out much better than the second half of season 4.  I’m ready for the show to explore what will occur when Ali rejoins normal society and how the girls respond to having an army and the A team after them.

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